Love the high-quality programming at PBNR? So do we! Wow, we have a lot in common, we should totally hang out more. These generous sponsor-lords make our shows possible and are in no way blackmailing us into promoting their products and services. Please buy their wonderful stuff so we can get Mr. Stuffles back.

The Chose Your Own Adventure Bible  

Are you suffering from a bout of painful nostalgia from the 1980s classic Choose Your Own Adventure novels? Do you wish your kids had the same thrill you had as a child of turning a page to see what fate had in store for you? At the same time, are you worried about the crass secularism and morally loose lifestyle those books promoted? Well, rest assured, we have a solution for you! From the people who brought you PrayerWorks® and Cheesus Crisps™, it's the Choose Your Own Adventure Bible! (Available in KJV, and, for ecumenist heretics, NIV.)

Dog Whiz

Brand New!!!!! It's Dog Whiz™-brand hotdog-like spray! Never again will you have to wait for frozen, precooked hotdogs to boil, as your whiny, screaming children make you long for the carefree, single days of youth. No more will you have to juggle clunky ketchup bottles and crumbly buns, as youignore that nagging voice in the back of your mind telling you they are a chain, keeping you trapped in this prison called "home." Comes in eight delicious flavors! (Note: Dog Whiz™ is not an FDA-approved source of nutrients.)